Where would Buffy have been without Rupert Giles? He was one of the first people Buffy bonded with at Sunnydale High, a stuffy British librarian who soon proved to be so much more than he seemed. As Buffy’s Watcher, Giles would be her mentor, teacher, and guide to the terrifying, bloodthirsty vampires (and every other demon) of Sunnydale.

A founding member of the Scooby Gang, Giles was the older, wiser buddy that everybody else turned to for answers. But was he really as close to Buffy Summers as fans tend to think? Here are some reasons why this Buffy the Vampire Slayer friendship was fundamentally flawed.

It’s (Supposed To Be) A Strictly Professional Relationship

As we know, Buffy and Giles share a unique relationship: that of Slayer and Watcher. The Watcher’s duty is a sacred one; he must guide the Slayer, train her, protect her and ensure she is as well prepared as possible to face the hordes of vampires, demons, and other grim beasts she’s destined to come up against.

That’s… well, kind of a big deal, as far as job descriptions go. Needless to say, both Slayer and Watcher have to be on top of their games and dedicated to their respective callings. There’s no room for mushy moments and friendship here.

She Doesn’t Take His Lessons Seriously

Right from episode one, there are a couple of patently obvious roadblocks to the whole “sacred duty” thing. For one, Buffy is trying to escape from the vampire run-ins of her past and has no interest in delving into that world again. For another, she’s the kind of student who can’t even commit herself to a piece of homework, let alone an ancient calling to pummel unimaginable cosmic horrors into tiny chunks of demon-spam.

As a result, she constantly frustrates Giles with her lack of attentiveness towards her training. The relationship between the two of them could have gone a lot smoother if she’d been more cooperative.

Giles Is Very Stuffy And “Old”

At the same time, though, it’s tough to entirely blame Buffy for her less-than-enthusiastic attitude. She couldn’t have been given a companion she has less in common with.

Rupert Giles is of the age that most teenagers would deem impossibly old (read: middle aged). He dresses…well, in the exact clothes you’d imagine a stuffy bespectacled librarian to wear. What is the young and cool Buffy supposed to think when presented with this man? Things did not look good for their relationship right from the off.

Buffy Is Essentially The Anti-Giles

Now, they say opposites attract, and sometimes they do. Having some key differences can make any relationship richer, whether it’s a romantic or platonic one. People can introduce you to all kinds of pursuits, foods and Netflix binges you’d never have considered otherwise.

Nevertheless, sometimes those differences are just too significant. That’s the issue these two iconic characters face. How can they possibly empathize with each other? As with many school librarians, Giles finds the behavior of teenagers completely unfathomable, and this stylish young woman fresh from Los Angeles is definitely no exception. In everything from work ethic to fashion sense, they’re polar opposites of each other.

What Do They Really Have In Common?

Despite the numerous barriers between them, there’s one crucial factor that unites Buffy and Giles: their stake (pun intended) in the fate of Sunnydale, and the world at large. As there’s supposed to be just one Slayer (though the show plays it fast and loose with this rule on all kinds of occasions), the pair of them are really humanity’s only true defence against the nasties that converge on the Hellmouth.

There’s one thing they share in common, then: a desire to find and dispose of hideous creatures. That’s all well and good, but aside from that (and neither of them want to do that, they’re compelled to), what else do they have in common? It’s more a relationship of necessity than anything else.

She Doesn’t Understand His British Ways

One more factor that complicates the relationship between Slayer and Watcher is the fact that Giles is British. This may not seem like a big deal at all, but Buffy has always been a show that tempers its super serious moments with silly comedy, and much of the latter comes at Giles’ expense.

Buffy and the gang are just so snarky about Giles’ background. His love for tea, his “poshness” and such are the constant targets of goofy jokes. It’s just another little barrier for the pair, who really could’ve tried harder to understand each other.

He Can’t Always Trust That She’ll Do The Right Thing

One key thing that Giles always tries to instill in Buffy is a respect for her duty. Whenever she wants to cancel patrolling for a night at the Bronze or to visit an undead lover, he’ll usually remind her just how important her duties as a Slayer really are.

Yes, everybody needs some downtime, but somebody as important as Buffy Summers also has to be super responsible. She shirks her duties at times, but she also has a tendency to do the exact opposite and dash into perilous situations by herself. With both of these habits in mind, it’s clear that Giles struggles to rein her in and he often despairs about the situation.

He Isn’t Always There For Her (Even If It’s For Her Own Sake)

In the iconic musical episode “Once More With Feeling,” the whole gang is charmed by a villain who forces them to express truths they were suppressing through the medium of song. In Giles’ song, he states that he’s going to have to leave Sunnydale, for the Slayer’s own good; she’d become too reliant on him.

By this time in the series’ overarching plot, things were building towards a climactic battle with the greatest and most powerful evil the show ever saw. Not exactly the ideal time for Buffy to be without Giles, but you can see his reasoning here: there are limits to a Watcher’s responsibilities, and he was trying too hard to shield her. Nevertheless, as fans saw a little later, this decision almost stretched their relationship to the breaking point.

She Used Him Quite A Lot

As the Council often complained, it was clear that Buffy and Giles had a deeper connection than Slayers and Watchers are “supposed” to have. They had grown to care for each other, which can be dangerous because it clouds decision-making on both their parts. So argued the Council, anyway.

Giles took a fatherly role in Buffy’s life, and was there to comfort her during all kinds of tragedies, both in the course of supernatural business and in her day-to-day personal life. The issue here, however (which we touched on in the last entry) is that Buffy would tend to use Giles as a crutch, a way of escaping from these terrible circumstances. He would deal with everything from her finances to the finer points of her duties so that she wouldn’t have to, but you can’t bubble-wrap a Slayer. Perhaps she hadn’t meant to, but it was unfair for Giles to ever have been put in this position.

He And Her Mother Had A “Thing”

Over the course of the show’s long run, Giles became very close to the Summers family. It’s surprising just how close he became to Joyce Summers, in particular, in the Season 3 episode “Band Candy.”

Under the influence of Ethan Rayne’s drugged chocolate, Sunnydale’s adults were behaving like irresponsible teenagers (as part of Mr. Trick’s plan to leave the town open to attack). Giles’ “Ripper” persona takes over temporarily, and he raids stores and battles the police to impress Joyce. Not only that, but Joyce comes back to Giles’ home, and Buffy later learns that they had a very short-lived romance of sorts. It was another awkward little issue between Slater and Watcher that had to be swept under the rug.